There is a quote by Vladimir Lenin which says, "show me your friends and I will show you who you are." Another quote I found from an unknown author says "show me your friends and I will show you your future."Many of us have come across this quote and generally apply it to a friend or loved one. Yet, I would like to ponder the thought of applying this quote to love. Show me your mate, show me your girlfriend/boyfriend or spouse and I will show you your love. In this post, I would like to discuss the changes we endure based on the type of person we choose to love.
Psychologically or socially, we all go through a metamorphosis based on the person we choose to love; whether you care to admit it or not. In the thinking of writing this post, I was led to the definition of a chameleon. Generally, when we think of the lizard that changes colors, we think of this lizard which changes color to blend in with the environment or in a humans case; the crowd. However, there is the definition of a chameleon that speaks to this discussion. Taken from the second definition in the online Webster's Dictionary which defines chameleon as, "a person who often changes his or her beliefs or behavior in order to please others or to succeed" . After reading this quote, I wondered how often we go through changes for someone we love; in some cases, it only leads to disappointment.
Much like the chameleon, which is a lizard who changes colors to blend in its environment; some of us change our behavior or environment to "fit-in" from being emotionally hurt or happy. So we choose to make others happy without making ourselves happy first. Most continue this cycle with multiple partners eventually losing themselves to a bottomless pit of emptiness. Feeling depressed and lonely, and for what? To please someone that did not appreciate our worth or value from the start.
Some people become sexual whores for their lovers or even worse, a "Do-girl or Do-boy" to feel accepted. It is important not to become this person because you leave the door open to allowing your self-worth to be trampled on like a bunch of wild beast trampling over its prey. This is, of course, an unhealthy relationship. Being a "Do-body" relinquishes your control of power for self-happiness and you become a personal-slave to the person you are trying to please.
As we all walk the path of love, let us cultivate one another. Being fertile bodies and walking vessels for someone to plant love in us. Always remember, what is planted in you will grow; good or bad. The body doesn't care what is inside of it. If it is good, it will produce fruit for all to eat and your life will be full of hope, joy, and prosperity. However, if it is bad, then it will grow and produce humility, depression, and self-righteousness until the ground is tilled by a tiller to fix the soul of the heart. The tiller can be equivalent to a "soulmate" that genuinely helps to turn the dirt which is your heart so good seeds can be planted.
In plain language, we must fight off changing for people. Real love conquers all, endures all and accepts all. Yet your pursuit of sharing real love should not make you change who you are in this world. The love that you put out should be respected and reassured with care. Stop changing for people who do not respect your innocence. The world does not know real love due to being blind by the tangible things it tries to display as Love. Real love isn't tangible! You can see love displayed but it is not tangible.
This I believe is the greatest secret about love. The moment you try to turn love into something tangible, it turns into something hurtful, disgusting and disrespectful. I love people because it is my DNA. I was made to love and to be loved. You should choose this as well. Today, make a conscious decision to love because it's who you are and not because someone decided to make their love tangible by giving you something. LOVE IS FREE! It cost nothing to love. Don't make the mistake of putting a for sale sign up on your love, because then it will cost you more than you will ever know.
Remember to never blend into someone else' love like the chameleon blends into its environment. Love is an environment meant to cultivate and nurture. Real love stands out like the sun, bright like a diamond. Love makes us better even when we disagree. Your heart is a canvas that you own and it is up to you how and what you allow someone else to paint on it. Love is your expression and breath given to the world to live like life support. It is my feeling the world is on life support because it lacks love. Real love is desperately needed. Your love is Free no matter the situation! So please sir, please ma'am, do not blend into a love that is unfruitful. Hold true to your heart and guard it like a diamond. You won't give an expensive diamond away, so don't give your love away. Love unashamed and your life will flourish with happiness like never before.
Until next time, Later!
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